Trump Card

Reprinted from my Rambling Moron column that appears weekly in the Platte County Landmark.

we-shall-over-comb-tump-2016Donald Trump should be the next President of the United States.

There. I’m on the record. Absolutely. Let’s elect him to Congress and the Supreme Court, too while we are at it. I guess, technically, you’re not allowed to do that – but I’m betting The Donald could swing it.

Quick – name me another Presidential Candidate not named Hillary. You can’t do it! Hillary has basically been running for President for 10 years and Trump has been doing it for one month and has already eclipsed Ambassador Clinton in name recognition, Buzzfeed posts AND calls for public apologies. Beat that!

Remember that time he insulted “all Mexicans” for sneaking across the border and raping people? Oh golly. That Trump. What will he say next? Remember that other time that he called Senator John McCain the opposite of a war hero because war heroes don’t get captured? That dude is zany. I’ll bet he could really get Congress under control!

Oh sure, I couldn’t tell you anything close to a platform of issues he’s standing on. But I can’t tell you what Hillary or Jeb or <Insert Rich White Guy Here> is running for either! At least with Trump, we’ll get some entertainment out of it.

Politics has finally reached the level where a guy like Trump is almost paletable versus the rum dums and central casting politicians that we’ve seen for years. If you held a gun to my head, I couldn’t pick out Rand Paul or Rick Perry out of a lineup. I don’t even know which one is a Republican or a Democrat! But I know Donald Trump. And sometimes the Devil you know is better than the Devil you don’t.

Imagine what a knee-jerk Commander-In-Chief could do with ISIS or Iran or Russia. Think of all of the Vegas showgirls you’d get dancing at the State of the Union address. That’s ratings! People would be talking about politics again! People would be interested in the process. (Let’s be honest, most would be learning about the impeachment process after he shotguns us into World War III, but still – WE’D BE ENGAGED!)

For decades, politics has been out of reach of television junkies and sports fans like me. We watch NFL pregame shows on Sunday mornings, not Meet the Press. But I’ll bet you with Donald Trump in the Oval Office would get me to turn off Terry Bradshaw after he insults the Queen of England calling her a “cheap tart.” THAT would get my attention.

Listen, with all that’s been going on in Washington the past 20 years, you gotta admit that things have gotten pretty stale. Politicians are getting settled in. Rarely do you see anything big come out of Washington. We haven’t gotten into a proper “on the brink” scrape in decades.

Donald Trump will fix that, I tell ya.

Trump 2016 – Not the leader we want, but the leader we deserve.

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