I contribute a weekly column to the Platte County Landmark under the “Rambling Moron” name. It’s a great Northland Newspaper and well worth a subscription. The following is an copy of my article which appeared in the 4/11/12 edition – printed with permission.
PARK HILL MISSED A SHOT AT REALITY TV
In last week’s school board elections, Park Hill voters missed out on a chance to make history. Oh, sure, we congratulate the two new additions to the school board, Allison Wurst and Fred Sanchez, but it seems that NONE of you had enough of a sadistic sense of humor to vote for the most curious candidate to come down the pike in a while, white-power advocate Edward Stephens.
Come on, weren’t you just a little curious on what would’ve happened had the “white culture” fan Stephens made the school board? Would he have painted all the busses white? Would he have changed the home page to all district computers to www.vanilla-love.com? Would he have rewritten all the American History curriculums to have Hitler win the war?
Clearly this guy has a screw loose, but I believe that sometimes the best way to expose these losers to the world is to put them in front of a microphone. Have you ever actually listened to some of these clowns talk? Stephens had the balls to say on his Twitter account, according to The Pitch, that “race was the matter.” Surely he’d have come up with some entertaining proposals. Maybe he’d have proposed making the Park Hill South Panthers the Park Hill South White Polar Bears? Oh, sure the rest of the board would vote it down, but not after we all had a good laugh.
There would’ve been packed houses in school board meetings as his proposals to change to white rice only in school lunches were shouted down by parents and students. Participation would’ve been at an all-time high as folks came from near and far to hear the racist and divisive comments of a school board member. You might’ve even gotten your own TLC Reality Show.
No, instead Park Hill voters went with safe, boring choices. Heck they might even be competent with ideas to better test scores and improve facilities. When has that ever brought entertainment? How can you make the newspapers with “safe” choices?
Park Hill missed out on a historic vote to make 20/20 or Dateline NBC. Oh, sure, you might’ve been the laughingstock for putting a man in office who didn’t “want to be politically correct” and wanted all the white people to flee the district. You folks missed out on quality entertainment.
Oh sure, I might look at things a little differently. I enjoy a little bit of chaos in my politics. But did you have to vote the poor guy dead last in the election? His street cred with the rest of the sheet-wearing white supremacists is going to go in the toilet. The Grand Wizard is likely to make fun of him. Maybe he’ll have to clean dishes at the next KKK picnic.
You voters are mean.
In the meantime, I guess you voters will just have to take solace knowing that you selected to improve your district by voting intelligent school board members who don’t hate minorities.
But with that kind of thinking, you won’t make very much of a reality show. Instead, you’ll enjoy your higher test scores across students of all creeds and colors.
(With his tongue often firmly planted in his cheek, Chris Kamler is active on Twitter, where he is known as @TheFakeNed. Reach him via his web site, ramblingmorons.com)